We’d both been special toward each other and special toward the drug, able to maintain a certain distance from it. I’d like to say it was because ...e both had sense, but I think it was actually because we both were cowards. We’d seen too many people go over the edge. Sandra was strange. She had an iron discipline in some aspects of her life, practically no control in others, as if it were an all-or-none proposition. She discipline her use strictly. Me, I just got scared, backed off and left. “Let’s talk about something else. We’re just going around in circles here.”“I’m sorry.”“Don’t be. I appreciate you speaking up, but I think for now, just let me handle this one.”I stared at the ceiling, searching in vain for another topic. Part of me just wanted to ask her to leave, but I needed to end the conversation on a better note. Lately, I felt my connection with Lara becoming weaker every time we talked. I wondered if it was just the Alana thing she seemed fixated on, or if something. More

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