She said that if I worked out some maybe that would change. Oh, and some plastic surgery might help. And I should try wearing clothes with labels that...didn’t read Abercrombie and Dork.” “Anyway, they announced an amateur strip contest. Not sure why they bothered. I was the only guy in the joint without a bare chest, it being stylishly covered with my Abercrombie and Dork T-shirt. Counting bartenders in briefs and shot boys in jock straps, I quickly calculated that there was an average of 0.375. The topic reminded me of what Eddie had told me about his family, and I found myself telling Seth what I'd been told, and how I was rethinking the idea of letting Eddie send a picture of me to his mother--a woman who probably wouldn't like me, anyway. When Seth asked me if it bothered me that my own grandmother probably wouldn't approve of me, I decided that I was indifferent. I didn't see myself calling Eddie's mom grandma anytime soon, anyway. I already had a grandma, as insane as she made. More

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