"Hello" Howie" Can you come over? We need to talk," she said."Let's give it some time," Howie said.Becky said, "Oh ... Howie, I am sorry. I guess I re...lly knew you wouldn't do anything like that. I was jealous. Please forgive me. I feel really bad."Howie said, "Don't feel bad. Nobody is perfect."Becky was in his three AP classes.Monday morning, she asked, "You're mad at me, aren't you?"Howie said, "No. I was disappointed but not mad."After class she said, "I am sorry. I blew it didn't I." It's. The hopeless fantasy I still could not let go of.What am I doing?"I love you." The words half-choked in my throat. And then I jerked in place, barely believing I just sputtered it out. For years, I'd made that a really bad habit with Courtney."Excuse me?" Her eyes were wide with surprise, and she quickly set down the warm milk onto the coffee table.My mind was racing. Did I really just blurt that out? It had been months since the Graduation vision, months of not being able to get Courtney out. More

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