“What?” “Show me your penis. I have a lot to teach you about it, and I want to measure it.” “Do you measure a lot of ...uy's peters, Mom?” “In my younger, wilder days, yes, I measured quite a few. One friend of mine liked to make plaster casts of them, but I don't think she'd have had enough for one of you.” He flushed and squirmed a little. It was so fun teasing the little cutie, even if it was so terribly wrong. I went and got a tape measure. "Here's a good dumb BRUNETTE joke for you. So this brunette guy goes into a library. As a matter of fact, he looked a lot like you. Hmmm." She winked at Alan. "Anyway, he tells the librarian, 'I want to return this book. It was terrible; there were so many names it was impossible to keep the story straight.' The librarian - yet another genius-level blonde, by the way - turned to another librarian and said, 'Hey, check it out. That's what happened to our phone book.'"Alan snickered. "Funny.. More

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