I make decisions that better me. My life is the one I live, no one else’s. After all of these ‘revelations’ I started digging deeper. My invest...gation became a quest. A quest for what? Well, that seems to only show itself with time. My journey led me astray from my peers. I realized that my way of thinking was more advanced than those of my age. The more I learned and observed, the clearer my own mind became. I began to know where my emotions stemmed from and how to follow my heart when need. The problem was the more I pretended, the more I knew I wanted to touch, feel and kiss a woman. My schoolgirl crushes were focused on a narrow range of people, limited by a strict upbringing and life in a boarding school. My thoughts centred for a while, when I was probably 16 or 17, on the head girl. Her name was Sonia and she was Lebanese. She had dramatic black eyes and black hair that was long, almost to her arse. She played hockey amazingly well and I would watch her as she wove her way. More

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