I'm the puniest mortal that ever was, Todd thought morosely. He couldn'teven get up the energy to jack off tonight, and that was the one thing hehad ...pent his summer practicing. Todd Farber, Master of the One-HandedJack-Off, Dread Lord of the Monkey Spankers. It was amazing how manytimes he'd done it, considering he had only the Nancy Friday book, twoissues of Variations, and the April PLAYBOY with Jenny McCarthy. Thenagain, Jenny alone had been good for a whole bunch of orgasms, the. Alright so on with the story. I was in my room listening to my friends talk about whatever we talked about back then. I lived alone which most saw as a rare privilege but I was always lonely. Then one of the staff members opened my door and said to report to the principle; Mr. Barlow's office. My friends started ooh'ing saying I was in trouble so I kicked them out. Upon entering Mr. Barlow's office I noticed he was stressed out about something, which he always was when someone gets in. More

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