But she also thought about the coach and Smith, she tried not to but every now and then it got the better of her. In the shower or someplace else she ...ould think of the two men dominating her, using her. Then she'd shudder to try to shake away those thoughts. She'd try to think of Timmy and the one or two clumsy times they had made love, she had thought they were the most exciting things that had ever happened to her, but every now and then she pictured the coach, naked, holding her by the hips. Looking at my newborn girl, I grieved over the life that never was. I don’t get involved in the argument of pro life or pro choice. What I feel is personal. In the long run it was Sandy’s choice, but I still to this day regret not discussing it more. There are certainly a lot of ‘what ifs’ and ‘could have beens’, but that doesn’t make the hurt go away. Two years later, Mae came along. The same feeling s of guilt haunted me. I had great wife and two beautiful daughters, but I grieved just the. More

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