That was, somehow the most surprising thing about waking up in a coffin, without any memories, hearing an ancient twisted being of nebulous origin tel... his subordinates to rub acid in my eyes, and being dressed in armor evil enough to make a town of hobbits shit themselves. The fact that I felt a burning (no not that kind of burning) need to find someone to fuck was strange because it felt so at odds to the rest of the situation. I sat on a ruined throne, gazing at the titanic chunks of stone. I was retired and had a lot of free time on my hands and one day I sat down at the computer and decided to see what all this Internet fuss was about and the more I played with it the more I found and I became a Net Junkie. More specifically - I became a Net porn junkie and in no time at all I had over twenty sites under "favorites" on the computer. Those sites were my sex life and on any given day I would visit them and masturbate to get sexual relief. The question could be asked, "Why didn't. More

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