As I was eating, my cel phone rang. I fished it out of my pocket, and said, "Hello?"An off-key voice blared into my ear, "Are you ready for some FOOTB...LL?"I cracked up laughing. "What the hell are you doing calling me?" Ah, we're still at the hotel, waiting for the bus to pick us up to take us to the stadium." It was Jake, of course. "I had a few minutes to kill, so I figured I'd wish you a happy New Year." Right back atcha." Sheila there?" Yup." I turned to Sheila. "It's Jake." Jake?" she. He said I was playing with it I said Play with it? I thought you just pee with it Hes older than me, I was clueless. He said Watch, he proceeded to slap it back and forth and side to side. I said Youre lucky I got nothing to play with He said You want to play with it I said Can I He said sure go ahead touch it. I touched it like it was a dead fish, making it spring up and down. He said, rub it up and down. So I did, but it was dry. He told me to spit in my hand and rub it. He liked it , I. More

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