A big part of me, the one who accepted, wanted to go on with that and carry on. But the other part was yelling at me Good girl! Let this bozo pop your...cherry! And that was the predominant part when I ran away from him, leaving him half naked in that bed. It was the weirdest moment of my life, running from a guy that, I knew, was the best option for me, like he was some kind of monster. He would never forgive me and Id probably never forgive myself. It happened that I took my car and I drove. This was back in about February. It was devious, simple, and devastating. He explained that underneath all that quiet submission and sexual depravity theres still a brilliant mind clicking away. And that someday she was going to see that our marriage was totally fucked up and that would be the end of that. He wanted to do something about that. To make her experience the conflict between her potential and the life she was living. To have to confront it every day. It would push her deeper down,. More

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