I get excited when it feels like it might get out of hand. After a trulyabusive session, when you'd think I would have felt the worst, I insteadfeel r...lieved, relaxed and empowered. .In my case the ultimate cause of this masochism was inadequate fathering.My dad was an iron worker and I remember him mostly being too tired to doanything with us boys (except, significantly, the occasional spanking). Somany of the skills I needed to function socially as a boy (i.e. learn tothrow a ball, learn to. "With that lipstick on you do look like a sissy. Maybe youshould wear lipstick all the time to let people know you are asissy." "I am not a sissy! I am sorry that boy groped you but you have tounderstand there was nothing I could do about it" "Well, even that girl could see you are a sissy. I can now seethat you are indeed a sissy. A sissy doesn't do anything to protecthis wife. Pull into that drugstore up ahead." He pulled in and parked. He said he would wait in the car but shetold him he. More

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