She came back shortly after, turned off the TV and grabbed my hand and pulled me up stairs to her room.Lauren sat on her bed and said, “I know you h...ve a boner from watching that sex scene.” I quickly moved my hands in front of my towel where my dick was. Lauren laughed and said, “You don’t need to be embarrassed, I’m your cousin. I’m not going to make fun of you, I’m just going to help you get rid of it.” She moved my hands away from the towel and took the towel off, leaving me bare naked. I’ve been diagnosed with a chronic fear of giants.He says I have Feefiphobia.“Orion’s Belt is a big waist of space.”Terrible joke. Only three stars.Scene: costume partyA: what are you dressed as?B: can’t you tell, I’m a harp!A: your costume is too small to be a harp...B: calling me a lyre?!Bloke goes to a costume party, stark naked, painted green with his girlfriend on his back. Someone asks ‘what are you supposed to be?’, he replies ‘I’m a tortoise’. ‘What about her?’, he replies... ‘that’s. More

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