I pushed my plate away and sipped my Chablis, looking around the restaurant at the boring clientele, mostly couples and a few single men who either gl...nced shyly or leered in my direction. Oh god, I was bored, why had I bothered to dress up..... and then I saw her come in. She was with a guy and another couple and they were laughing at some joke or another. They walked across and sat down to the side and slightly behind me but I could study her over the rim of my glass in a mirror on the side. "I didn't sleep much that night.? I was torn between fear of somethingthat had nearly killed me once, and the desire to look that thing in theface and tell it that I hadn't given up and wouldn't quit.?In the end, I decided the second case was better.? I wasn't all thatthrilled about becoming a female to do it, but deep down I knew that I'dnever be at peace with myself, or anyone else, if I didn't at least tryto get back out there.Oddly the idea that I would have to do that as a woman didn't. More

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