I then decided that I needed professional help. So I went to this plastic surgeon that Laura had recommended. I was told that he could make a silk pur...e out of sow's ear. I wasn't that optimistic, frankly I would have settled for a polyester one. I just told him to make me look pretty and I wound up looking like Helen Reddy. I don't know what was worse, being clocked as a TS or having complete strangers come up to me on the street crooning "You And Me Against The World". Laura took one look. ''''wooooo dude stop what the fuck stop''pulling me on my stomach on his lap, my arm in my back holding them in place''im so done listening to your excuses , i told you, Slap slap Slap, oh no you dont get away from this ''''dude dude wtf stop please ahhhh ouchhhh ouchhhh fuck man your crazy ''my sweat pants down ass up him just smacking it holding my arms with his big toned hand''you gonna start to listen , im so fucking done with that attitude ''slaping my ass hard making me yell for him to. More

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