“Yes, I used to service it sometimes.” I said with false modesty.“You sucked it?” He asked.“Yep. No fucking. I just sucked it.” “How muc... of it?” He said incredulously.“Oh… every inch of it.” I said proudly.“No way! There is no way you could suck EVERY inch of a thing that big!” He insisted.“Do you want me to prove it?” “Go on then, prove it!” He challenged.I had to get serious and lose my smile as I kneeled before my shrine. I already had a very wet mouth so I could slip on fairly deep. A penguin was driving through the desert when his car broke down. He waddled to the nearest phone to call AAA. His car was quickly towed to the nearest garage where the mechanic told him he would need a couple of hours to check out the car. The penguin, being a good natured bird, didn’t complain but wondered off to find the closest supermarket. He proceeded to the frozen foods section and hung out near the fish sticks. After an hour he got in the freezer next to the vanilla ice cream and ate. More

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