I hadn't used it with anyone since Karen. To me, loving meant opening, and opening meant hurt. I had started loving Karen in ninth grade. I was naive ...nough then to believe that my love shielded me from harm, and then the harm came. Ostracism and taunts from fellow students for being different. Foster care because my mother wouldn't accept my choice, then the pain of losing both of them. My world changed into something horrible overnight, and it was judged - by others - to be my fault. I had. She looked amazing and I got hard right away. I took her to the living room where I opened a bottle of wine for us. We drank and talked, kissing each other every few minutes. It was about nine thirty that we realised that we had finished the whole bottle and she suggested to take her to bed.Up in my room, we lay on my bed kissing. We held each other close as our hands roamed each other's bodies. I pulled down the zip at the back of her dress and slid my hand over her bare back.She pulled away. More

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