There was an unmistakeable bounce in my step as I strode out to my small white van (which had no logo on the side to advertise the fact that it didn't...belong to the ACME Water Softener Company). I had five calls to make, and all of them were within a mile or so of Louise Woods's house. No time wasted driving around, looking for little boxes optimistically named 'Mon Repos' and 'Dunwerkin'.The major difficulty about writing a story based on the day-to-day activities of a water-softener installer. I had strapped my seat belt on, but only over my chest (I sat on the lap part of the belt so I could take my pants off, but covered my chest with the strap in case the police came by – no need to give them a stupid reason to pull me over with what I wanted to do!). I was stopped at a red light with little traffic, so I pulled my jacket off and put it on my passenger seat, quickly put my car in park and pulled my shoes off and took my pants off, leaving them at my feet so I could quickly put. More

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