‘Parp!’ A loud fart escaped and echoed round the toilet bowl. Barely needing to push at all, she heard the familiar crackling sound as a large, al...ost snakelike turd oozed out of her bottom and curled into the toilet bowl, hitting the water with a gentle thud. As it did so, she heard the sound of footsteps which she recognised to be Barnaby’s, creeping about on the landing by the bathroom door. She could tell that he was listening – ‘listening in’ on what really ought to have been a private,. She smiled and stood. “I understand… what would you like to do then?” “I’d like to return the favor. You won’t have to pay me of course.” “I’m going to have to decline.” “And why is that?” “It’s not my job to take. And I’ve waited so long…” Tears burned in her eyes. “I don’t even know you. And yet…” He buried her face in her hands. “I-I’m not married-” “You cannot marry me. I would disgrace your name. I would disgrace the lowest of names.” No one wants me… She let out a. More

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