I did genuinely like him but not sexually and tried to tell him. After ten minutes, Sam opened the door. I wrapped an arm round his shoulders and le... him into the bedroom where his normal clothes were on the floor. He hugged against me sobbing he said he had planned to lose his virginity on his birthday, and that he found making friends difficult. I felt sorry for him and said I would help him but I could not make love to a man, I suggested he use my wife’s toy, which she thought I did not. Unfortunately I received a permanent mark for surviving, as it was rare for a bottleneck of 50% to leave someone unbroken after even six months.I helped myself with a personal mantra I was careful never to breathe out loud. “I’m invisible. I’m nothing. I’m not worth it.” It helped me mute any reactions which might make my life difficult. More difficult.The day continued after the assemble with assigned duties until Meal time came at mid-day. After we ate our prescribed meals and you can bet. More

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