I've been playing a part, trying to be what I think aman is supposed to be, but it's always felt false, I understand that now.I'm ready to start accep...ing who I really am.DAY 36I bought my first tube of lipstick today. The cosmetics aisle was sobright, and I had to wait until there wasn't anyone around. My heart wasbeating so hard I could hear it. I felt like I was trying to rob a bank.I had to use the self-checkout, and I kept worrying that someone wouldsee me with it. What would I say? But it. That way, we could entertain each other, both with stories of our fucking with men. She was always rather conservative in her tastes, fucking, blowing, not much else. I would try anything and every thing.….That was a lazy summer day. I was lying, naked on our bed, casually masturbating. My wife had been reading, sitting up beside me, also naked, because she didn’t like to dress up when it was warm. Now she was in another room, the radio was playing classical music.“Are you just going to lie. More

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