"Evelyn left us, we went up a few flights to the offices and found workdoing stock requisition together, it's the way I have handled grief inthe past....Mary seemed to be deep in thought while we did it, she wasunfocused and many times I thought she would toss the clipboard anddemand we stop but she didn't she continued on. She didn't join us forexercise or Scrabble in the rec room but she did wake up the next daywith a smile on her lips and a song in her heart.Weeks later I braved the showers in. As hard as Doug tried he couldn’t give me what I needed sexually. I was frustrated and he knew it. The weather got hotter and so did I. Almost every morning after Doug left for work I masturbated, fantasizing about being with Frank, then Russ or a stranger I would meet. Although my husband didn’t please me totally I still loved him. Also I was afraid of hurting him so any thoughts of having an affair were out of the question. What I did want was to wait for the right opportunity and soon my. More

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