.. I really did love her after all.Because of the chemo, we had to bottle feed Erica. Between my parents and myself we managed to look after her. Howe...er devastated I was at losing Janet, I had Erica. I was determined that Janet's self- sacrificial decision would not be wasted.I suppose we spoiled her. Okay, she was a sunny child and seemed to be no problem; it was our pleasure to indulge her. When she reached puberty, though, I had to wonder if she'd been taken over by some alien entity. Oh,. I was so overloaded on humiliation, I couldn't even conceive of worrying about anything else happening. Fortunately, nothing did, except for when a car filled with the teenage girls from the diner went by and they were honking and yelling and laughing. But they kept going. I'd been used up, I guess.I found that Marianne had parked in the furthest corner when I finally got back to the shopping center parking lot. She turned the car off and held out the keys to me as if to say, "Here, hold them. More

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