..no I can't do it here. There are too many people it would hurt so I have to stay until it's my time to go. I only want to kill myself, not end other...peoples lives. Diary maybe you can't give me the answers but I wish someone could. I have never had a time in my life where I haven't had a good memory...But that's all it ever is; a memory. Nothing solid or right in front of me. I can remember times I had laughed and what not. Tried to be a good and faithful best friend. Tried to find a way to. I'd come to expect being alone at lunch or without friends for a few days. There are cliques in every school, Jocks and Nerds and so on, and I didn't know exactly where I'd fit in this bunch. There were some Native Americans — I was used to calling them Indians — as well as Farm Kids, City Kids, Goths, Druggies and Others. Keep in mind most of my education had been at the hands of the military, which is strictly run and tightly supervised.Over the first two weeks, I gradually became friendly. More

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