I have to call even to use ze toilet.”“Well, I came here to see if I could use the lift.”“Ze lift?”“Yes. There’s supposed to be one. Goe... straight to deck four.”“Ze lift...”“Have you seen it? Could it be in the Sayada lounge? Can I get there from here?”“Non, eet ees right here, Anglais. Behind you.”Fuck. Fuckerdyfuckerdyfuck. Double fuck with whipped cream and a massive ‘Fuck This’ cherry, new at FuckDonalds for only ninety nine fucks, limited time only. Obviously it wasn’t a full-size lift: it. Crystal was more depressed and withdrawn than I’d ever seen her before. She clung to Judy with a limpet-like closeness that I’d never imagined possible before. I was so sick of the disaster that was the American Tour that I just couldn’t be bothered any more. I no longer cared whether we played another gig in America and I openly speculated with Andrea, Jane and Jacquie whether I could be bothered to stick with the Crystal Passion band when we returned to England. ‘Why not just call it the. More

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