I think, had this offer not come, I would have been able to stifle my homosexual curiosity and live a perfectly normal heterosexual lifestyle.The prob...em with Mr. Hamilton's offer was my fear that I wouldn't be able to separate the act from the reality. God, I didn't want to end up a sissy fag. But what if I couldn't resist the temptation? What if at the end of eight years I couldn't go back to a normal lifestyle?I stood there, looking out the window, trying to make up my mind. In the end, I. ‘Is this a proposal?’ ‘No, just an admission.’ ‘Of what?’ ‘That I’ve adored you for years and that, well, what does it matter? You’ve got that hyphen in your name.’ She reaches up and holds his face. ‘Well, to answer your question, I can indeed pretend it isn’t. And, as long as we’re confessing, I think you’re a really cute guy.’ That’s all it takes for Ben to do what he’s longed to do at all those Seders. He crosses the line and stays across even as the rabbi’s advice tumbles around in his. More

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