Wash my hair for me.”Ted washed her hair, twice. She leaned against him to maintain her balance while her eyes were closed. In the meantime, she kep... up a steady patter of conversation.“So, you live in Chicago,” she stated.“That’s right.”“And Karla invited you to get with us this weekend.”“She did.”“You expect anything like this; like what happened?”“A little, maybe. I mean, I knew she’d want to screw. The other, though. It was kind of a surprise.”“You disappointed?”“Of course not. I mean, all. " Uh ... no, there's just us." Huh?" You're the first person to be damned." What?" I gave him the look I reserved for idiots who told me there were aliens abducting cows."You're it, yep ... Number one!" He smiled. "I'm really glad you're here too!" You mean to say nobody else, in all of human history, has ever been damned to Hell before?" Uhhhhh..." Satan looked at me very apologetically, "No. I mean ... Yeah. That about sums it up." But what did I do? I mean, I killed myself, so what? Zillions. More

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