Making love to the wee hours in the morning, trying to find ways to sneak off during the day for a quickie and making love again on Sunday morning. Th...t lasted about 2 years and has gone downhill ever since. We are at the point where we hardly notice each other now. So, now it’s about 9:30 and the usual daily ritual starts. I get online, find a porn site and a chat room in another window. The chat room has about 10 people in it. Most chats are flirty and I toss my little comments in when the. All of it had to go. He was right, I realized about forty-five minutes later. When I was empty, and exhausted, and bloodshot-eyed. Old Courtney had to go. To do otherwise would confuse the authorities, and likely get me charged with my own death. But it hurt, and it sucked, and there was nothing I could do about it. The only way for me to have a life was to move on from my old one. I had to kill the girl. For months, and even years to come, there would be weak moments, where I would melt down. More

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