I was awakened from my thoughts by the ding of a text message coming from my wife. I opened it up and inside it was a picture of my gym bag sitting in...the driveway with the comment, “You forgot something honey – want me to bring it up?” Oh shit, I thought. I showed the message to Benny and gave me a shit eating grin and said, “sorry bro,” but said I didn’t have anything to worry about because he had plenty of clothes for me. I responded back to my wife and told her not to worry, Benny had. So I sucked cock because I loved doing it but it was also done as an alternative to submitting to having sex. The conflict I had here was that in many cases I did want to have sex with these guys but I stopped myself from going all the way because I also had the hots for girls and didn’t want to become addicted to sex with men. It sounds a bit daft now as I enjoy sex with both men and women but in those days it wasn’t clear in my own mind that I was bi-sexual. I thought I would have to decide. More

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