Anyway that weekend I sat down with the draft and made notes as I went along. Reading from my notes, I gave my observations to Janelle. Two of the ma...e characters, William and Veton, still seemed like limp fish without any apparent purpose in the novel. And there were two sections of text where I got really confused as to what was going on. But in total I liked it better than her first. Just my opinion. I showed her the specific sections to which I was referring. ‘Thanks very much, John, for. They looked as large as the nails on his middle fingers — larger even. The wide areolas were covered with goose bumps.As he was somewhat aware of his mother's legs on either side of his hips, he reached out with the tips of his index fingers, and carefully laid them on the tip of his mother's nipples. He immediately noticed an intake of breath by his mom the moment the tips of his fingers made contact with the rubbery nubbins. Almost as if they were miniature joysticks, Marty used the tips of. More

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